Vending Machine Warnings
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The Coke machine on the second floor of Wean Hall is adorned with a bright orange warning label. It states that rocking or tilting the vending machine may cause the machine to fall over, resulting in serious injury or death. |
| The Pepsi machine features a similar label with a unique twist. Apparently this machine is designed in such a way that people who attempt to rock or tip it will not only be crushed underneath, but will also be simultaneously electrocuted by a multitude of lightning bolts directed at their brain. Perhaps this is a sacred vending machine, protected under the surveillance of God, so that blasphemers who attempt to defile its holiness will be struck down by His wrath. |  |
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