Love Calculator

Posted August 22, 1999 at 2:21 am 26 Comments

Have you ever checked out the Love Calculator?  Like the Hamster Dance or the Dancing Baby, it’s one of those annoying little web trends that manages to spread, virus-like, until it has saturated the internet community.

Here’s a description of the Love Calcuator, excerpted from the official Love Calculator website:

We all know that a name can tell a lot about a person.  Names are not randomly chosen: they all have a meaning.  Doctor Love knew this so he made another great invention just for the lonely you!

Sometimes you’d like to know if a relationship with someone could work out.   Therefore Doctor Love himself designed this great machine for you.   With The Love Calculator you can calculate the probability on a successful relationship between two people.  The Love Calculator is an affective[sic] way to get an impression of what the chances are on a relationship between certain people.

I downloaded the Love Calculator and amused myself with it for a while.  It consists of two text boxes and a button.  You simply type in the names of two people and press the button, and a number that purportedly corresponds to the likelihood of a prosperous relationship between the two people is “scientifically computed.”

lovecalc.gif (5154 bytes)

Not a bad concept, I suppose, but it seems narrow-minded in its application.   Apparently “Dr. Love” holds a rather traditional conception of the idea of  love.  Inspired by the somewhat less traditional manner in which love is portrayed in the Isaac Hayes song “Simultaneous”, I decided to make the Love Calculator more versatile.  I spent a little time deciphering Dr. Love’s secret love formula, and then programmed the new Three-Way Love Calculator.

lovecalc3way.gif (6947 bytes)

Now I’m no PhD like Dr. Love, so I can’t claim to have anything approaching his level of expertise in these matters, but it seems to me that this new version of the Love Calculator is a substantial improvement.  Give it a try and let me know what you think.

Doesn’t work?  You may have to install the VB runtime libraries.

26 Comments »

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  1. Hello sir/madam pls offer me any formula wich can calculate love for a lover, thanks best regards

    Comment by kc — February 4, 2007 #

  2. i am truly loving my girl pooranima
    my self is arulkumar
    kindly send me love percentage

    Comment by POORANIMA — April 9, 2007 #

  3. hey i really like your thing its badass

    Comment by natasha — September 30, 2007 #

  4. I and my wife have 46% 😉 and we are happy.

    Comment by Love Calculator — October 23, 2007 #

  5. Hi,
    I Haresh Bavise i want know whether name praveena for which my family find girl will be happy life.

    Comment by praveena — December 29, 2007 #

  6. THIS IS SICK!

    Comment by Kailee — January 12, 2008 #

  7. i love dis bwoi called matti but i dont know if he feels the same way

    Comment by chelsea — November 24, 2008 #

  8. OMG I LOVE DIS BOI CALLED LUCAS MAN HE ARFCAST N BELL BUFF GOT A 6 PAK M8 XX

    Comment by EMILY — January 23, 2009 #

  9. i love my girl friendso much that we can’t depart from each other. please send me pictures and connect to other friends.

    Comment by SIMON — February 3, 2009 #

  10. omg what lames.you guys need to seriously know how to spell. i mean im sure you learned how to do that in elementary school

    Comment by Erica — February 10, 2009 #

  11. this is stupid

    Comment by Erin — February 11, 2009 #

  12. i love it

    Comment by Danielle — February 14, 2009 #

  13. its nice one……….. but i cant belive it whether its true or not…………

    Comment by Mano — February 17, 2009 #

  14. 100% love ser teste ma cher

    Comment by loveng — February 19, 2009 #

  15. I LOVE SONU….. VERY MUCH……..HE IS MY LIFE……….

    Comment by RIA — February 25, 2009 #

  16. I LOVE DAKOTA BENTLEY

    Comment by cayla — April 7, 2009 #

  17. I LOVE KENNY WILLBOND FOREVER AND EVER! IF U R READING THIS RIGHT KNOW KENNY I DO TALK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Comment by amanda — April 7, 2009 #

  18. I LOVE DAKOTA BENTLEY THAT ALEXIS CANT HAHAHAHAHAHA

    Comment by CAYLA — April 7, 2009 #

  19. I LOVE KENNY FOREVER AND EVER! IF U R READING THIS RIGHT KNOW KENNY I DO TALK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Comment by amanda — April 7, 2009 #

  20. kENNY U SHOULD STOP LIKING SIERRA AND LIKE ME! U SHOULD ALSO SHOULDN`T LIKE BRENNA ANYMORE

    Comment by amanda — April 7, 2009 #

  21. FUCK YOU WANT TO HAVE TRIPLETS

    Comment by JORGE — April 8, 2009 #

  22. actually…i don’t belive in those calculators…
    They all are some kind of joke..:)
    and….I better liked this one:

    http://pose-calculator.co.cc/ 😀

    Comment by stella — June 19, 2009 #

  23. I WANT SEE MY LOVE PERCENTAGE

    Comment by AMIT — November 30, 2009 #

  24. i love someone but she treated me as a friend.i dont like this.

    Comment by samir — December 16, 2009 #

  25. i am truly loving my girl pooranima
    my self is arulkumar
    kindly send me love percentage

    Comment by chandru — December 25, 2009 #

  26. Kareena has small.!
    Rakhi has big.!
    Ranimukerji has 1 big & 1 small!
    Aishwaryarai has two small!
    What’s dat?
    ?
    The letter ‘R’
    but i like the way u thnk.

    Comment by saif kabir — March 25, 2010 #

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